Journal Entry #1 - Keep Quiet?

Sibling Conflict: October 3rd, 2009 (Saturday)

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Sibling conflict is inevitable and there are many reasons behind it. First thing first, I have a twin sister, and we do treasure each other and count on one another a lot. Nevertheless, we do have disagreements from time to time. Therefore, I would be sharing one of my conflicts that I had with my sister during this past week. So here it goes...

Whoever gets bored. he or she will be trying to get your attention and that is when a conflict may arise. Hence, that was exactly the reason why a conflict had occurred between my sister and I because she was bored. This may sound silly but please don't get me wrong. My sister was getting on my nerves when she started making silly noises. Right, everyone has these moments when he or she is in boredom. However, I was not able to control myself from shouting at her and yelled out something close to this, "Shut up, You!" I have to admit that I wasn't smart-headed enough to control myself, and I realized that she was literally "controlling" me. This is a very usual conflict that can be happened between many siblings out there, but now that I have given the chance to share my personal conflict, I would be:

(a) - Describing the conflict

(b) - Identifying and explaining the surface and core issues of the conflict
(c) - Suggesting the methods to resolve the conflict
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(a) To start with, the conflict I had between my sister will be categorized into the Interpersonal Stage[1] because it was a conflict among two or more individuals. Moreover, it can be identified that it is a small conflict, but if one of us was not able to control ourselves then it can get to a level where violence may take place.

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(b) The core issue of the conflict was that my sister was using a way in expressing her feelings that I don't like and I felt disturbed. In addition, I was the one who didn't realize that she was actually seeking for a need in someone to talk to. For that reason, I was not concerned with hearing the reasons for why my sister was making those noises. It can be determined that there is usually a reason in behind something that is happening. Therefore, I should have asked myself questions in why she is doing something like that. Perhaps questions like - What does she want? Do I know why she wants that?

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(c) There are some conflict negotiation skills that I can develop to resolve this particular conflict.

1. Being a listener: becoming a listerner to somebody is a method which can used because my sister was making noises, so there must have been a reason behind it. As a matter of fact, I should have asked her why she was doing that, and being a good listener and see what she has to tell me. Consequently, it shows that I do care about her and that she is someone that I treasure.

2. Imagination: Sisters are friends in a way. In my case, I might have came up with jokes and have fun with her making silly noises togetheer. Even though, when I'm irritated or not in the mood in doing so, it is significant that we are to show support to one another.

3. Communication: Communication is always an useful and essential method in dealing with a conflict. We are to talk through the problem together and respect each other's point of view. As a result, communication is a way for both of us to understand another person's perspective, and to make a final decision in how we should solve the conflict appropriately.